Scripture Memorization Initiative: Verse #4

Confession: the first three verses were not that hard.  Adding a fourth without forgetting verses one thru three…pretty hard.

Maybe that’s why I only got this far when I tried to do this in 2013.

But, my confession continues: it’s probably hard because I’m only spending a few minutes each week reading and saying my verses.

In 2010, I had great success with Bible verse memorization because I recorded myself speaking verses onto a small, handheld, digital recorder and during my commute to and from work, I would play back my recordings and work on getting the verses down pat.  I racked up probably twenty verses that I could quote with ease – and many of them I still can.  During late 2010 and early 2011, I was immersed in the Word a lot and The Lord was making Himself easily found by me.  It was a sweet season.

But, I digress, my choice for verse four is:

“Your eyes saw me when I was formless; all my days were written in Your book and planned before a single one of them began.” ~ Psalm 139:16 HCSB

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I chose this verse because in a conversation with a dear lady and new friend from church, she quoted this Bible verse and explained that this verse changed how she began to pray for herself and the day ahead of her.  She said, “Now I pray, ‘Lord, let me walk out what you’ve already written. I want to be on the page of the book that You’ve written for my life.'”

That was so profound to me that I came home and looked up the verse and it felt like a rhema word for me so I chose it for my memory verse.

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Cherishing Disappointment

I’ve been thinking about disappointment lately.  Not the kind that I’ve experienced, but disappointment that others have experienced, and in some cases as a result of my behavior or choices.

The dictionary defines disappoint as: to fail to satisfy the hope, desire or expectations of.

It has been five years since the last time I saw or spoke to my father.  He wrote me a letter in 2010 detailing the ways in which I have disappointed him by my choices and the direction my life has gone.  Since that letter, he has ignored all of my attempts to contact him.

For my father has forsaken me, but the Lord will take me in. ~Psalm 27:10

Last summer a girlfriend believed that I was not handling a trial {a trying set of circumstances} in a spiritually mature fashion.  She rebuked me verbally and followed it up with an email which laid out biblical principles to support her position.  Without seeking a response or understanding from me, she went on to withdraw her presence and companionship from my life.

Love is ever-ready to believe the best of every person. ~ I Corinthians 13:7 Amplified

Yesterday I received a curt email from a former co-worker and friend who insomuch inferred that he felt slighted that I did not reply to an email he had sent; {I wrote him nine days later, but did not click reply, instead I created a new message and apparently I did not address or respond to all he had written}.  Additionally, during those nine days, he decided to simplify his life and included me in a major Facebook un-friending edit.

Love is not touchy. ~ I Corinthians 13:5 Amplified

Hurt feelings.

Offense.

Perceived slights.

Disappointment.

Unmet expectations.

Sheesh, it’s everywhere… and I’m sick of it.

Is disappointment really something that we should be holding on to?  Should we be cherishing it to the point that we back away or cut people out of our lives?  And if we do back away or withdraw from that friendship or relationship, are we doing it because we fear being hurt or disappointed again, or are we trying to punish that person?

In all three of the scenarios I mentioned above, I felt as thought I was {in part} being punished.

I copied this down from something that Beth Moore published either on her blog or Twitter: “If we insist on nurturing and coddling our disappointment rather than moving on through it, it can burgeon into a full blown identity.  We end up wearing a sign that says, ‘I am so disappointed’, and we will be and continue to be, and people will back away one by one.  Write a new sign: Romans 5:5”

So we can either insist and persist in disappointment, or we can move on through it.

One big problem of holding on to disappointment: you fail to realize your ability to disappoint people yourself.  If you’re so busy holding on to and defending why you were let down by so-and-so, your perspective does not include the humility needed to realize you are equally capable of letting someone down.

I have no control over anyone else but me.  So, in light of all that I’ve written and all that I’m processing & pondering in my heart, I think one of the best things I can do is to come away from this prayerfully asking The Lord to help me not be the kind of person who cherishes disappointment.

This morning while driving to work, I was thinking about people that are not in my life anymore.  And the Holy Spirit reminded me that The Lord will prune relationships that are not bearing fruit.  And then my perspective shifted a bit to consider that maybe instead of fearing that I’m missing out, it is a gift that I’m missing out.  What additional heartache might The Lord’s pruning be sparing me from?

“Don’t be discouraged when people let you down.  The disappointment of man might just be God’s divine appointment for your life.” ~Joseph Prince

Downton Abbey, Season 5, Episode 3 Great Moment

I couldn’t keep up with blogging about each episode, but I just had to recognize this moment from episode three.

Lady Mary explaining that she won’t be rushed into an engagement with Lord Gillingham (despite having just returned from a five-day escapade with him!)

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The many faces of the Dowager Countess.

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GrandMama Violet always has the best lines.

“In my day, a lady was incapable of feeling physical attraction until she had been instructed to do so by her MaMa.”

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Scripture Memorization Initiative: Verses #2 and #3

The second verse I chose to memorize was:

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Return to your rest, my soul, for the Lord has been good to you. ~ Psalm 116:7

I wanted something simple yet powerful to meditate on while I went to doctor’s appointments, faced a blood draw, IV and surgery.

Indeed the Lord has been good to me.  Today was my post-op doctor’s appointment where I received excellent news.  There were no cancer, pre-cancer or abnormal cells found in any of the tissue removed during surgery.  None.  Completely clear.

I thank and praise The Lord for this huge answer to prayer.  But, it was actually the very small errand that I ran after my doctor’s appointment that made me realize how ever-present and aware God is of me.  I needed to get a bulb replaced in my car’s headlamp.  My cell phone battery was dead so I couldn’t use Siri to supply me with directions to the car dealership.  I knew where I was.  I knew where the dealership was, but I didn’t know how to get from one place to the other.  Sounds silly I know, but I didn’t know the shortest or best route, just a really long circular way.  So, I set out driving and made a left turn and then a right to get off of small side streets and onto larger thorough-fares.  When after only a few minutes of driving what do I see?  A Honda sign.  A Honda service center, a satellite location, under the same umbrella of ownership as the dealership I always go to.  I never knew it was there.  I had only driven minutes from the doctor’s office, instead of the 45 minutes I had originally intended.

And this story may seem so pointless to anyone else, but in that moment, I felt very SEEN by my God.  In my gray Honda driving down Fairbanks Avenue, God in Heaven sees me and is aware of all of my needs.  Even when it’s just to get a headlight changed.

The third verse that I have chosen to memorize is:

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Consider Him, who endured such hostility from sinners against Himself, so that you won’t grow weary and lose heart. ~ Hebrews 12:3

This world will make you weary.  This world can make you lose heart.  Last week I was reading and this verse jumped out at me.  I don’t know if I ever read it before.

Consider Him.

Consider Jesus.